Update

Well, I finished the first round of Gemzar last week. I have felt really crappy ever since. Lots of Nausea, vomiting, and almost no appetite. The weight loss is really starting to catch up with me, last weigh I was 138lbs, I was about 197lbs before my last surgery. It's to the point where I am scared that I won't be able to gain more weight while going through more chemo. I am seriously considering calling this treatment to a halt until I can get healthy. If you saw me in person you would shocked at how skinny I am, I am shocked and it is weighing on my mental state. Along with the other problems I have endured over the past months.

Here is a brief rundown of my medical treatments for cancer the last two years:

9/03 - 4xBEP chemo - very strong chemo, very strong side effects. I was in my best shape and was able to endure it well.
1/04 - Radical Prostatectomy - I bounced back pretty well and finished my undergrad that spring.
11/04 - Radical Lymphnodectomy - Again I recovered from the surgery pretty well.
1/05 - 4xAdria (The Red Devil) - I tolerated the chemo well, lost some weight but bounced back shortly after completion.
6/05 - Radical pelvic resection - I lost my bladder, rectum, and most of the surrounding tissue with the hope of curing the disease. This surgery still has lingering effects and I have yet to fully recover.
7/05 - neutron Therapy - In the hope of controlling the local disease in my pelvis I had this type of radiation. It is at this time I find out that I have lung mets (tumors), last count was 20.
9/05 - Ifosimide/DTIC - I had one week of this chemo and almost went crazy, I stopped it.
10/05 - Gemzar - My last option, quality of life concerns are forcing me to face whether the treatment is worthwhile.

So as you can see I have a lot on my mind right now.

--I went by my oncology clinic today and had my blood counts checked, they were all good!